Medieval Sourcebook:
St. Bernardino of Siena:
Two Sermons on Wives and Widows
[Coulton
Introduction] No mere
extracts can do justice to St Bernardino's mission-sermons, yet no book of
this kind could be complete without some specimens. The following are taken
from the course of 45 sermons preached in the great public square of his
native Siena during August and September of the year 1427, and in the 48th
year of his age. How these sermons were recorded, the writer of the Prologue
tells us himself.
"Moreover, how well-pleasing and acceptable to God were the
labors which the Saint endured for His honor and to the profit of his
fellows, is shown among other things by this present Book, which, as it sets
a new style and rule for preachers, so God has willed that, (as it were
beyond all fashions hitherto established,) these sermons should be collected
and written for the love and increase of devotion. Wherefore the great and
mighty God inspired one Benedetto di Maestro Bartolomeo, citizen of Siena and
shearman of cloth; who, having a wife and many children, few worldly goods
and much virtue, and leaving for that time his daily work, gathered and wrote
these present sermons word by word, not omitting a single word which he did
not write even as the Saint preached it .... And, that you may note the
virtues and graces of this shearman Benedetto, as he stood at the sermon he
would write with a style on waxen tablets; and then, when the preaching was
ended, he would return to his workshop and commit to paper all that he had
already written on the aforesaid tablets: so that on the same day, before
setting himself to his own work, he had twice written the sermon. Whosoever
will take good heed of this, shall find it as marvelous in performance as
generous in conception, that within so brief a space he should have written
so full a matter twice over, not leaving one syllable unwritten-nay, not the
slightest of all- that fell from that sacred mouth, as may be manifestly seen
in this present Book."
The reporter does in fact note even the preacher's
interjections, the occasional protests of his hearers, and the casual
interruptions natural to these open-air sermons- "You there, by the
fountain, Citing your wares there, move off and sell them elsewhere Don't you
hear, you there by the fountain?" - "Let us wait till that bell has
stopped."-"Give it to that dog I send him off I send him that way I
give it him with a slipper!... That's it; when one dog is in trouble all the
rest fall upon him! Enough now, let him go" (II, 270; III, 305, 405)
…The [extracts] I give here are as continuos as possible, from
five sermons on marriage and widowhood, which not only show the saint at his
best as a stylist, but perhaps throw more light on medieval conditions than
any others.
WIVES AND WIDOWS
[Extracts from Sermons 27-32i, You shalt love your neighbor as
thyself. Luke 10.27.]
We
have to speak this morning of the love and affection that the man should bear
to his wife, and she to her husband…She who is wise has brought her daughter
to this morning's sermon: she who is but so-so, has left her in bed. O! how
much better had you done to bring her to hear this true doctrine! But to the
point.
Let
us see this morning the three foundations of my discourse. The first is
called Profit, the second Pleasure, and the :third Honesty or Virtue, which is all one
Let
us begin with the first, with Profit. If a thing be of little profit, you
love it little. - See now the world's love: do two vicious folk love each
other?-Yes indeed.-Why then? - for some profit that they find. O worldlings,
if the profit be small, small shall be the friendship between you! You
shopman, does such and such a one come and get him hose at your shop? - Yes -
Do you love him? Yes-Why? For your own profit, I say. For, were he to go to
another, you would have no more profit of him, and no more friendship. So
also with the barber: take away the profit, and you have taken the
friendship. Why, if one be a barber, and other another go to be shaved by
him, and the barber cut his cheeks be sure that he would lose all love for
him, and go there no more. Why then? Because the man is neither profitable in
his eyes, nor pleasant, nor honest. I knew a man who was at a barber's shop
for the shaving, and who cried, "Ha, what are you doing?"
"What am I doing" replied the barber "why, I am shaving
you". "No," (said the other) "instead, you are flaying
me" Let this suffice for the matter of Profit.
Now
let us add Pleasure to Profit, as with the man who entertains a mistress that
keeps his house, washes for him, cooks for him, lays his table and so forth;
and with all this profit he has also the pleasure of the flesh: all the more
is their friendship. Yet if she be of a swinish nature, unkempt, unwashed,
careless of her household, then is the love and friendship so much the less.
Well and good for a while; but presently, if she fall sick, to the hospital
she goes! Why should you make bile for her sake? gone is all your love, for
you have neither pleasure nor profit from her.. . This is no true love: true
love should be riveted by the three corners: true love is as God's love,
which has in itself Profit and Pleasure and Honesty to boot.. . . Moreover,
each should seek above all for goodness [in his spouse], and then for other
advantages; but goodness first, goodness first of all. Consider now and think
of such as choose their wives for other reasons; for example, of such as take
a wife for her good dowry's sake; if then they be affianced, and the dowry
come not, what (do you think) shall be the love betwixt them both? A love
stuck together with spittle! Nay, even though the dowry come in due time, yet
is this an inordinate love, for you have not looked to the true aim; many a
time has money driven men to do many things whereof they have afterwards
bitterly repented. Wherefore I say to you, lady, take not for your husband
the man who would fain take your money and not your self; take rather him who
would take you first and afterwards your money with you; for if he love your
money more than you, you are in evil case... Behold! I am neither Pope nor
Emperor; would that I were! This I say, for that I would proclaim a custom,
if I could, that all women should go dressed in one fashion, even as the
Roman women who all go dressed in linen, for their magnificence they all wear
white linen, on back and head, the wives of princes no less than other women.
And when they go mourning, they go all dad in somber colors; there, truly, is
a fashion that pleases me well. When they go to pardons, they go in light
attire: no labor of drawn thread in their garments, no spoiling of the stuff
with snippings and slashings, no such spoiling of good cloth to make their
bravery! Wherefore I say to you, lady, take no husband who loves your stuff
more than your body.. . . Has the man gotten the stuff without other goodness
or virtue?-Yes-Then, when the woman comes to her husband's house, the first
greeting is, "You ask come in an evil hour"; if she hear it not in
word, yet at least in deed, for the man's one thought was to have her dowry..
. Wherefore, you ladies who have daughters to marry, see to it that they have
the dowry of virtue to boot, if you would have them beloved of their
husbands.. . . Are the occasions of love but slender? then shall the love
itself be slendor. Do you know their nature? For example, do you know the
nature of mine host's love for the wayfarer? The traveler comes, and says:
God save you, Host! Welcome, sir - Have you anything to eat?-Yes indeed -Then
cook me a cabbage-soup and two eggs - The meal is eaten and paid, the
traveler goes on his way, and no sooner is his back turned than that
friendship is forgotten: while the eggs are yet in his bellly, that
friendship is already past. For it was riveted at no corner; such friendships
are as frail as a pear-stalk: shake the tree and the pears will straightway
fall; there is no strong bond of love to hold them. If the friendship be frail,
small is the love; if the pleasure be small, small again the love; if there
be little virtue, slight love again! ...
Wherefore
I bid you all, men and women, follow virtue, that your love may be founded on
these three things, Profit, Pleasure, and Honesty; then shall true friendship
reign among you. And when you have these three things, hear what David says
of you; "Your wife shall be as a fruitful vine, on the sides of your
house." Lo! all these three things are here. First, Honesty: your wife - your own wedded wife. Secondly, Pleasure: as a vine --how delightful a thing is a vine at the door of a house!
Thirdly, Profit, a
fruitful vine --rich in grapes and
profitable; from which three things grow and enddures true love between man
and woman. Enjoined by the sacrament of Holy Matrimony: of which I know
twelve reasons, four to each point. See now, and learn them. Four, I say are
the reasons under honesty, and four under pleasure, and four under profit.
The
first four, of honesty, you shall learn tomorrow, when I shall speak of the
sacrament of marriage; and I believe that, when I. shall have preached to you
of the right deeds of matrimony, seeing that you have not done them, you
shall all shrive yourselves again; for you have committed many sins which you
have never confessed. Tomorrow, therefore, you shall see whether any bag of
sins be left, and you shalt hear into what sins I shall enter, as a cock goes
upon his dunghill. Have you ever noted the cock when he come upon the dung?
how daintily he goes, with his wings spread aloft far from defilement, that
he may fly to his post ! So will I do; as a cock upon the dunghill, so will I
enter thereupon; wherefore I bid you bring your daughters tomorrow, for I
promise you that I believe you have never heard a more profitable sermon. I
say not [only] that your married daughters should come, I say all both
married and to marry; and in my sermon I will speak so honestly as to avoid
all defilement; even the very least! -- I misdoubt me sore of you; I believe
so few are saved among those who are in the married state, that, of a
thousand marriages, nine hundred and ninety-nine (methinks) are marriages of
the devil. Ah me! deem not that Holy Matrimony is an asses' affair; when God
ordained it, He di not order it not that you should wallow in it as the swine
wallow in the mire. You shall come to-morrow and know the truth. --But to my
subject again, and to my first four reasons; take them with discretion; 'tis
a sacred matter. And I say that there are many friars who say " would
that I had taken a wife ! " Come tomorrow, and you shall say the
contrary of this. I say then, there are four reasons that make for the
honesty of this God-ordained marriage. Have you noted, when the pack sits ill
[on a mule] and the one side weighs more than the other? Do you know that a
stone is laid on the other side that it may sit straight? so I say of
matrimony: it was ordained that the one might aid the other in keeping the
burden straight. And mark me, women, that I hold with you so far as to say
that you love your husbands better than they love you.
First
reason: the spouse you have is the spouse ordained for you by God. Second
reason: she is espoused to you by plighted faith. Third reason: you should
love her after Christ's example. Fourth: for her own tried virtue.
First,
she has been ordained for thy spouse by God, Who ordained this from all
eternity [Genesis 2:18 and 1:28; Matt. 21:6]....
Secondly,
espoused by plighted faith. Do you not see that, when you consent to
matrimony, a sign is given you, to last you whole life long? You, woman,
receive the ring from your spouse, which ring you bear on your finger, and
you set it on that finger which has a vein running straight to the heart, in
token that your heart consents to this marriage; and you should never be
espoused but with your consentient Yes....
Thirdly,
marriage is love. What does Paul say in the fifth chapter of his epistle to
the Ephesians?-"Husbands, love your wives as Christ also loved the
Church." . . . Would you have a faithful wife? Then keep faith with her.
Many men would fain take a wife and can find none; do you know why? The man
says: I must have a wife full of wisdom -- and you yourself are a fool. This
sorts not: he-fool sorts well with she-fool. --How would you have your
wife?-I would have her tall -- and thou art a mere willow-wren; this sorts
not. There is a country where women are married by the ell-yard. It came to
pass that one of these people wanted a wife, and would fain see her first: so
the girl's brothers brought him to see her, and she was shown to him without
shoes or head-gear; and, measuring her stature, he found her tallest of all
the maidens, and he himself was one of those puny weaklings! In short, they
asked of him, "Well, is she to your mind? " "Yea, truly, she
pleases me well." But she, seeing how miserable was his presence, said,
"Yet are you are not to my mind." Lo, was that not right? --But to
my point again. How would you have this your wife ? -- I will have her an
honest woman -- and you are dishonest: that again is not well. Once more how
would you have her? --I would have her temperate -- and you are never out of
the tavern: you shall not have her! O. how would you have this wife of yours
-- I would not have her gluttonous -- and you are ever at your fegatelli: [note: slices of pig's liver, wrapped in the fat of the caul, and
roasted brown]: that is not well. I would have her active -- and you are a
very sluggard. Peaceful -- and you would storm at a straw if it crossed your
feet. Obedient-and you obey neither father nor mother nor any man; you
deserve her not. I would not have a cock -- well, you are no hen. I would
have her good and fair and wise and bred in all virtue. -- I answer, if you
would have her thus, it is fitting that you should be the same; even as you
seek a virtuous, fair and good spouse, so think likewise how she would fain
have a husband prudent, discreet, good, and fulfilled of all virtue.. . .
And
no to my second head, of Pleasure.. . . Read Paul in the fifth chapter of his
Ephesians; "he that loves his wife, loves himself."-How may this
be?-Have I not already told thee that she was made of his own flesh, and by
God's hand?
...Wherefore,
in the teeth of all filthy revilers, I hold with the women, and say that
woman is cleaner and more precious in her flesh than man; and if a man hold
the contrary, I say that he lies in his throat, and will prove it against
him. Will you see? Why, tell me, did not God create man out of clay? -Yes -
then, O ladies, the reason is as clear as day! For woman was made of [Adam's]
flesh and bone, so that she was made of more precious things than you. Lo!
you may see a daily proof how the woman is cleaner and daintier than you. Let
a man and a woman wash as well as they can or may; and, when they are thus
washed, let each take dean water an wash again, and then note which of the
two waters is the dirtier, and you shalt see that the man's is far fouler
than the woman's. Why is this? Why, wash a lump of clay and see the water
that comes therefrom, and see how foul it is. Again, wash a rib with the
flesh belonging to it, and the water will indeed be somewhat foul, yet not so
foul as that wherein you have washed the day. Or, to put it better, wash an
unbaked brick and you shall make nothing but broth: wash a bone, and you
shalt make none such. So say I of man and woman in their nature and origin:
man is of clay, but woman is of flesh and bone. And in proof of the truth; of
this, man, who is of clay, is more tranquil than woman, who is of bone; for
bones are always rattling.
For
you women shame upon you, I say -for while I say my morning mass you make
such a noise that methinks I hear a very mountain of rattling bones, so great
is your chattering! One cries: Giovanna! another, Caterina! another,
Francescal Oh, the fine devotion that you have to hear mass! To my own poor
wit, it seems sheer confusion, without devotion or reverence whatsoever. Do
you not consider how we here celebrate the glorious Body of Christ, Son of
God, for your salvation? You should therefore sit here so quiet that none
need say hush! But here comes Madonna Pigara, and will by all means -sit
in front of Madonna Sollecita [i.e. "Mrs. Slow" and Mrs.
Worry"]. No more of this! First at the mill, first grind: take your
seats as you come, and let none come hither before you.-Now to my point
again…
Now
to my third division, of Profit, under four heads.. . Firstly, the
preciousness of fruit. O how precious are the fruits of a good woman, as the
Scripture says: By their
fruits you shall know them: ... Many
consider not the value of a boy or a girl, and many folk who have them hold
them of little worth, and when their wife brings forth a little girl, they
cannot suffer her, so small is their discretion! Why, there are men who have
more patience with a hen, which lay a fresh egg daily, than with their own
wedded wife: and sometimes the hen may break a pipkin or a drinking-vessel,
and the man will not strike her, all for love of her egg and for fear of
losing the profit thereof. O madmen thrice worthy of chains! that cannot bear
with a word from their wife, who bears such fair fruit, but if she speak a
word more than he thinks fit, forthwith he takes the staff and will beat her;
and the hen, cackling all day long without end, you have patience with her
for her paltry egg's sake; yet the hen will perchance do you more harm in
broken vessels than she is worth; and yet you bear with her for her egg's
sake! Many a cross-grained fellow, seeing perchance his wife less clean and
delicate than he would fain see her, smites her without more ado; and
meanwhile the hen may befoul the table, and he will suffer it. Do you not
consider your duty in this matter? Do you not see the pig, again, squeaking
and squealing all day long, and always befouling your house? Yet you bear
with him until he be ripe for the slaughter. You have patience with him, only
for the profit of his flesh, that you may eat thereof. Consider now, wicked
fellow, consider the noble fruit of the woman, and have patience; not for
every cause is it right to beat her. No!-There, enough now of this first
point.. . .
The
third point is the remembrance of her necessity .. . . Wherefore, as you see
that your wife endures travail on every side, therefore you, O husband, if
she fall into any need, be sure you help her to bear her pain. If she be with
child or in childbirth, aid her so far as it lies in you, for it is your
child also. Let all help her in any way they may. Mark her well, how she
travails in childbirth, travails to suckle the child, travails to rear it,
travails in washing and cleaning by day and by night. All this travail, see
you, is of the woman only, and the man goes singing on his way. There was
once a baron's lady who said to me: "Methinks the dear Lord our Master
does as He sees good, and I am content to say that He does well. But the
woman alone bears the pain of the children in many things.---bearing them in
her body, bringing them into the world, ruling them, and all this oftentimes
with grievous travail. If only God had given some share to man if only God
had given him the child-bearing!" Thus she reasoned; and I answered:
"Methinks there is much reason :by side."-Now to our point again!
Some
men say, "What need have I to take a wife? I have no labour; I have no
children to break my sleep at night, I have the less expense by far. Why
should I undertake this travail? If I fall ill, my servants will care for me
better than she would." Thus you say, and I say the contrary: for a
woman cares better for her husband than any other in the world. And not him
alone, but the whole house, and all that needs her care. Hear what Solomon
says: "He that poses a good wife, begins a possession." -
"Well," says another "I will not take a wife, but rather keep
a mistress; then at least I shall be cared for, and my house and my
household."-Nay, I tell you: for thus the woman will be set on laying up
for herself alone.- all her study will be of stealing; and, seeing things go
ill, she cares not, but says within herself "Why should I pain myself to
look so closely into every little matter? When I am grown old, I shall no
longer be welcome in this house.". . Wherefore, I say, it is better to a
wife. . . and when you have taken her, take heed to live as every good
Christian should live. Do you know who knows this? That man know it who has
her, the good housewife, who rules the whole household well. She sees to the
granary, she keeps it clean, that no defilement may enter in. She keeps the
jars of oils, and notes them well:-This jar is to use; and that jar is to
keep. She guards it, that nothing may fall in it, and that neither dog nor
other beast come near it. She sets all her study and all her care that the
jars be not spilt. She orders the salt meats, first in the salting and
afterward in the keeping, she cleans and them orders them:-This here is to
sell, and that there is to keep. She sees to the spinning, and then to the
making of linen cloth from the yarn. She sells the bran, and with the money
she buys yet more cloth. She gives heed to the wine-casks, lest their hoops
should break or the wine leak at any point. She provides the household with
all things. She does not as the hired servant, who steals of all that passes
through her hands, and who cares not for the things as they go away; for the
stuff is not her own, therefore she is slow to pain herself and has no great
love for them. If a man have neither wife nor other to rule his household,
know you how it is with the house? I know, and I will tell you. If he be
rich, and have plenty of grain, the sparrows and the moles eat their fill
thereof It is not set in order, but all so scattered abroad that the whole
house is the fouler for it. If he have oil, it is all neglected and spilt;
when the jars break and the oil is spilled, he casts a little earth on the
spot, and all is done! And his wine? When at last he comes to the cask, he
draws the wine without further thought; yet perchance the cask shows a
crevice behind, and the wine wastes. Or again a hoop or two is started, yet
it may go its way for him; or the wine turns to vinegar, or becomes utterly
corrupt. In his bed, know you how he sleeps? He sleeps in a pit, even as the
sheets chance to have been tumbled upon the bed; for they are never changed
until they are torn. Even so in his dining-hall; here on the ground are
melon-rinds, bones, peelings of salad, everything left lying on the ground
almost without pretense of sweeping. Know you how it is with his table? The
cloth is laid with so little care that no man ever removes it till it be
covered with filth. The trenchers are but sparingly wiped, the dogs lick and
wash them. His pipkins are all foul with grease: go and see how they stand!
Know you how such a man lives? even as a brute beast. I say that it cannot be
well for a man to live thus alone-Ladies, make your curtsey to me.. . .
The next sermon is on the same text and the same subject: though
specially intended for the daughters, it is still more outspoken than its
predecessor.
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